Loving the Little Days

So it's been a while!  We now have our daughter Elizabeth, Ellie, in our lives and she every bit as wonderful as we imagined.

There's so much I could share from the last 4 months, but mostly I want to share about my physical and spiritual struggles adjusting to life as a mommy.

A friend told us before she was born, that there are moments in every parent's life when you want to kill your child...well, I could understand him, but I'm not sure I really believed it!  Well, I will confess that I've had a few of those moments...when I'm so sleep deprived from not sleeping more than 2 hours at a time every night, for almost 4 months, and not being able to consistently take naps during the day....there have been moments when I broke down and cried because I was so tired...there were also a few moments where she was screaming or crying for so long that I was going crazy, and having horrible thoughts toward her...of course they were only momentary, and I immediately dismissed them as crazy sinful talk, but Satan has tempted me in many was to count my daughter as more of a curse than a blessing to my life over the last 4 months.

Ellie the day she was born: healthy and amazing!!

Ellie at 1 month: we had a photo shoot done with her

Ellie at 2 months: She started smiling and practicing standing!

Ellie at 3 months: Christmas Day

Ellie at almost 4 months (today):

I wore this red dress 25 years ago!!

The Bible says repeatedly that children are a blessing and good thing for our lives:
Psalm 127:3-5
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.

John 16:21
When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world.

Proverbs 17:6
Grandchildren are the crown of the aged, and the glory of children is their fathers.


So why do I feel like she is such a curse to me sometimes? I have foolish thoughts sometimes like...

"I never want to go through all this suffering again..."

"you make me never want to have any more kids..."

"this isn't worth it..."

"do not poop, please do not poop so I'll have to get out of bed to change your diaper"

"you better not be waking up this early!"

"just let me sleeeeeeeeep! you are such a selfish baby!"

Seriously, I can't count the number of times I prayed for her to sleep through the night and it almost never happens.  I'll wake up between 2-4 in the morning to feed and change a diaper and have the most sour, joyless attitude possible.

My faith has seriously been tested these last 4 months, and I have really been put through the Lord's refining fire.  All my sin is now easily visible on the surface of my life, and I feel hypocritical if I try to pretend I have it all together.

Yet God is so good to me through all my hard days and nights. This song helped me to wake up a little spiritually, and I would sing to myself it in the hardest times in the night when I was waking up multiple times: (still am waking up multiple times)

The Sing Team - I am Satisfied in You

It's a combination of the words from Psalms 42 and 63, and has been very encouraging to me in my hardest moments.


A few weeks ago, on new years eve, God gave me a revelation about what it means to be a parent, especially now during the little years.
Sacrifice....you sacrifice and give up yourself, your desires, your needs, so that you can take care of someone else's needs, someone who needs you to help them....this is so true about babies and small children. They are completely dependent on you, their parent, for all their needs.

It was then that I understood on a deeper level that Jesus did the same thing for me...giving up the easier way and taking the hard and painful path of obedience to the father in order to carry out the plan for my salvation!! Jesus has also experienced every hardship and temptation that I face now, but he had it much worse, yet was without sin!! Every time after I fail and sin, I remember this, and am incredibly humbled.

Hebrews 4:15 says:
"For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin."

There is a lot of sanctifying work to be done in my heart, especially about patience toward my children, and long suffering with joy, but I'm thankful to God that I'm aware of my sinful heart's condition and that God has given me a strong desire to change and be a better example of the faith to my children in the months and years to come.  

I recently found and started to read a recommended book called Loving the Little Years and by reading it and the Bible, I'm hoping to continue gaining a fresh perspective on the blessing of this time when my daughter is small and needs me constantly.  I want to constantly feel in my heart and soul that all my hardships as a mom are all part of the bigger blessing of having children. God certainly is using her as a sanctifying influence in my life, and I'm excited to watch her, and myself, keep growing.

End of summer updates

Well, it officially feels like fall in Kiev now.  We've got rain here all week and it's been quite chilly lately.  It seems like summer came and went really quickly this year.

Fall will bring a lot of changes in our life.  Most changes will revolve around the arrival of our first baby (Hoo Rayyy!!!).  She's due on October 3rd.

I've had so many challenges with doing all the documents and tests required simply to give birth somewhere in Kiev, that it seems like I'll give birth at home!! (kidding, but seriously, it's 37/38 weeks in pregnancy now, and the hospital still hasn't agreed to take me.)

You can help us in your prayers by praying that I will be submitted to the hospital and whoever my doctor ends up being will be qualified and handle me and our baby with care.

You can also pray for the first month or so once she comes, because we are expecting to be sleep deprived and stressed, and want to make sure that our relationship with God and each other doesn't suffer because of the amount of time she requires.

We are also praying about our finances, that everything will be provided that we need, and especially that we'll not worry about it if things get tight in the budget.  After all, God has thoroughly convinced us by his promise in Philippians 4:19 that He WILL meet all our needs.  "My God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus."

God always proves to us that he is faithful and cares for every kind of need we have.  For example, our home group gave us a surprise baby shower yesterday and showered us with prayers, affections and financial help.  It was a huge blessing for our family.

Here's a picture:

We also continue to pray about the possibility of entering into full time ministry as a family...but for now, we're are continuing to help the evangelism ministry in our church grow, recruiting people for the work of the harvest!  Luke 10:2 "And he said to them, “The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. Therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest."

Here's a picture of Oles evangelizing publicly recently near our home, at Leningrad Square.

For those of you who pray for us and read the updates about our life and ministry, thank you, and may God bless you abundantly through his riches in glory in Christ Jesus!

Summer Updates

It's been a while since the last post.  A lot has happened this summer in Almaz church and in our lives.

First we prepared the last few months for a 1 week public evangelism project, which was completed 2 weeks ago.  It was successful by the Lord's power alone and all of us were greatly encouraged by what we did and saw during the project.  The basic outline of the project is like this:
- we had a team of 4 Americans come, and we provided translators for them so they should do face to face street evangelism.
- there were other Ukrainian pairs who did face to face evangelism
- we had a team of 4-8 people depending on the day who read the bible on a loud speaker in a public place near the metro, and the other team members talked with the people who were interested in what we were doing.
- To prepare our hearts for evangelism we pent the first half of the day in devotion, bible study and prayer.  This time was what we needed to trust our hearts and actions to God.

We're still seeing the results from the project now...new people coming to church, new friendships with non-believers that will hopefully bring them to Christ and a new inspiration about evangelism within our church.
Here's some photos:

Praying

 Worship

 Public Bible reading and preaching

 Public Bible reading and preaching

 Sharing the gospel with people

 Our banner - John 14:6

 One of the only photos of me since I was a photographer for the week

As you can also see from the photo above, I'm now 30 weeks pregnant with our baby girl, Elizabeth.  There are a few small problems with my health, but we're praying and trusting God that everything will be normal and she'll be born on time and healthy.  Please pray for us as we finish out the rest of the summer, ministering in Kiev through evangelism, and preparing for parenthood!

God bless!
John 16:4 "Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."

Persecution and Lukewarm Christianity

Every week I get an email from Open Doors and International Christian Concern about prayer needs for the persecuted Christians in the world.  I try to read them and pray for the needs as often as I can, which unfortunately I don't do it every time.  This morning I read a few country profiles and news updates from Syria, Oman, and Eritrea.  

From the emails:

"Oman

There are a few countries on the World Watch List that we can’t share stories from. Even if we were to use different names, the Christian population is so small, that the story could easily be traced back to the individual. For their security, we are providing a different way to pray for the country this week.
Here are the top 10 things to know about what life is like for Christians in Oman:

• The law prohibits religious discrimination but all religious organizations must register.
• All public school curriculums (grades K-12) include instruction in Islam.
• Almost the entire Christian population (around 35,000) is made up of expatriates; indigenous Christians number only a few hundred.
• Foreign Christians are often tolerated and allowed to worship in private homes or work compounds.
• The government records religious affiliation on national identity cards for citizens and on residency cards for non-citizens.
• Muslim Background Believers (MBBs) risk persecution from family and society, but the government may intervene on request from the family. In such cases, these believers are often treated as psychiatric patients.
• MBBs can lose their family, house, and job and can even be killed.
• There are some government limitations on proselytizing and printing religious material. Non-Muslim groups are prohibited from publishing religious material, although non-Muslim religious material printed abroad may be imported after government inspection and approval.
• The Protestant Church in Oman (PCO) is the fruit of the active presence of RCA, a branch of the Reformed Church of America (RCA), which started its work in Oman in 1893.
• Currently PCO, under the combined leadership of the Reformed Church of America and the Anglican Church, ministers to over 1000 believers from 60 countries.

Syria
In April 2011 a war began in Syria with peaceful protests against the regime. The war has escalated and Christians have found themselves in the center of it all. Two archbishops were captured and another leader in the country has been killed. The overall war is for tolerance and pluralism. If the government wins this war there is no more hope for any type of religious tolerance in Syria. Many Syrians have been displaced, fled to neighboring countries, or have been killed. 
Full story here...http://www.persecution.org/2013/06/01/syrias-future-tied-to-freedom-for-captured-christian-leaders/


Eritrea

Christians in Eritrea, Africa are being heavily persecuted. The Christians are being forced into traumatizing events like being held inside metal shipping containers with no access to ventilation or toilet facilities. Some of the Africans that try to flee are captured and brought to the desert and sold. Those that they capture are also tortured to death. Sometimes their organs are removed so that they can be sold.  The Eritrean government will deny any of these reports. The president says he fears religious freedom for the worry that it might lead to a Christian nation.
Full story here...http://www.persecution.org/2013/06/02/christians-in-eritrea-face-extreme-persecution-thats-getting-worse/  "


When I read the news about Christians in other countries in the world...it makes me question myself and the church who live in parts of the world where persecution is almost non-existent why we are not all the more eagerly using this freedom we have to share the gospel with as many people as possible.  I think sometimes that our lack of persecution is exactly what keeps us in a state of lukewarm Christianity.  This is a scary thought.  I pray for my heart all the time that I will treasure Christ like the man who found the treasure in the field...
"The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field." Matthew 13:44

I want to treasure the Lord in the same way!  I want to eagerly give everything away for him, but I often struggle to even leave my comfort zone to share the gospel or reach out to someone in need.  Because of this I even pray sometimes that God will cause difficulties in my life that I will become stronger in faith... In Luke 14:31-33 Jesus says “Or suppose a king is about to go to war against another king. Won’t he first sit down and consider whether he is able with ten thousand men to oppose the one coming against him with twenty thousand? If he is not able, he will send a delegation while the other is still a long way off and will ask for terms of peace. In the 
same way, those of you who do not give up everything you have cannot be my disciples"

The question I ask myself when I read such passages as this is "Will my faith stand through the fire of persecution?"  Am I ready to really pick up my cross and follow Jesus?  My brain screams yes, but my heart feels reluctant sometimes because of the great cost I know it will take.  With this I realize how lukewarm my faith really is sometimes!!!!!

What I understand is that if I am afraid to share the gospel, or to do something for God, it is because I do not count him as worthy of my sacrifice...and I am really ashamed of the gospel.  Paul says in Romans 1:15-16 "That is why I am so eager to preach the gospel also to you who are in Rome.  For I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes: first to the Jew, then to the Gentile."  

Maybe you struggle with the same feelings, or maybe Satan has so weakened your faith that you do not even think about such things.  So I will pray that God will work mightily in my heart and in your heart to give us courage and love for him, that we will give anything in order to glorify him and share the gospel.  Please, I also ask you to pray for the persecuted Christians in the world.  Proverbs 31:8 "Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute."

May God bless you today!

The Kingdom of Heaven

While studying the gospel of Matthew this morning, I read through chapter 13, which predominately talks about the kingdom of heaven through a series of many parables.  One parable is the parable of the good and bad seeds.
"24 He put another parable before them, saying, “The kingdom of heaven may be compared to a man who sowed good seed in his field, 25 but while his men were sleeping, his enemy came and sowed weeds among the wheat and went away.  26 So when the plants came up and bore grain, then the weeds appeared also.  27 And the servants of the master of the house came and said to him, ‘Master, did you not sow good seed in your field? How then does it have weeds?’  28 He said to them, ‘An enemy has done this.’So the servants said to him, ‘Then do you want us to go and gather them?’  29 But he said, ‘No, lest in gathering the weeds you root up the wheat along with them.  30 Let both grow together until the harvest, and at harvest time I will tell the reapers, Gather the weeds first and bind them in bundles to be burned, but gather the wheat into my barn.’”  

Jesus explains the parable a little further in the chapter:
"36 Then he left the crowds and went into the house. And his disciples came to him, saying, “Explain to us the parable of the weeds of the field.”  37 He answered, “The one who sows the good seed is the Son of Man.  38 The field is the world, and the good seed is the sons of the kingdom. The weeds are the sons of the evil one,  39 and the enemy who sowed them is the devil. The harvest is the close of the age, and the reapers are angels.  40 Just as the weeds are gathered and burned with fire, so will it be at the close of the age.  41 The Son of Man will send his angels, and they will gather out of his kingdom all causes of sin and all law-breakers,  42 and throw them into the fiery furnace. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.  43 Then the righteous will shine like the sun in the kingdom of their Father. He who has ears, let him hear."

Hell is a very real place, as is heaven a very real place.  I need to remember this often when I'm interacting with non-believers, so that I will seriously consider their destiny, and what it means for them if they do not repent.  Many people, especially in Ukraine and America, falsely believe they will go to heaven.  They assume that because they believe in God, even profess Jesus was the son of God, and are not a "bad person", that this will save them a place in heaven.  They may not even believe in Hell, because the thought of such a place of eternal agony and torment is not something bearable to think about.

Isaiah 66:24 talks about Hell as a place where "their worm shall not die, their fire shall not be quenched, and they shall be an abhorrence to all flesh.”

When I think about Hell, it is unimaginable exactly how horrible of a place it is.  It seems that there are not words in the English language that could fully describe what an eternal place of torment is like.

In Luke 16:19-31 Jesus tells the story of Lazarus, the poor beggar who was faithful to God, and the rich man, while He thought he knew God, was not saved by his religion and suffered the consequences in eternity. 


¹⁹ “There was a rich man who was clothed in purple and fine linen and who feasted sumptuously every day. ²⁰ And at his gate was laid a poor man named Lazarus, covered with sores, ²¹ who desired to be fed with what fell from the rich man's table. Moreover, even the dogs came and licked his sores. 
²² The poor man died and was carried by the angels to Abraham's side. The rich man also died and was buried, ²³ and in Hades, being in torment, he lifted up his eyes and saw Abraham far off and Lazarus at his side. ²⁴ And he called out,‘Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus to dip the end of his finger in water and cool my tongue, for I am in anguish in this flame.’
 ²⁵ But Abraham said, ‘Child, remember that you in your lifetime received your good things, and Lazarus in like manner bad things; but now he is comforted here, and you are in anguish. ²⁶ And besides all this, between us and you a great chasm has been fixed, in order that those who would pass from here to you may not be able, and none may cross from there to us.’ 
²⁷ And he said, ‘Then I beg you, father, to send him to my father's house— ²⁸ for I have five brothers—so that he may warn them, lest they also come into this place of torment.’ 
²⁹ But Abraham said, ‘They have Moses and the Prophets; let them hear them.’ 
³⁰ And he said, ‘No, father Abraham, but if someone goes to them from the dead, they will repent.’ 
³¹ He said to him, ‘If they do not hear Moses and the Prophets, neither will they be convinced if someone should rise from the dead.’”

From a Shepherd's Conference preaching by Steve Lawson, we can learn several things from this passage:
1. The Rich man represented the pharisees in this story...rich in Religion but devoid of real faith.  He knew Abraham, and God, for he called Abraham "father."  This is a term that only people who are familiar with the bible and God would have used at that time.
2. The poor beggar was rice in grace and spirit, which is why the angels carried him to heaven (vs. 22)
3. Hell is an immediate place - The rich man was died, buried and immediately was in agony in the fire in Hell.  As in 5 seconds after his death, his soul was already in Hell...no waiting time, no second chance, no purgatory...just Hell, immediately upon death. (vs. 22-23)
4. Hell is a very separated place from heaven - "he lifted up his eyes and saw Abraham far off " (vs.23)
5.  Hell is a place of agony, torment, unquenchable fire, and it is unending (eternal) (vs. 24)
6. Hell is a haunting place - people there are fully aware, more than they were in their life, to every sin, every opportunity they had to repent and believe, every time they heard the gospel, and every mistake they ever made.  They will remember their life forever. "But Abraham said, ‘Child, remember that you in your lifetime received your good things, and Lazarus in like manner bad things; but now he is comforted here, and you are in anguish." (vs. 25) 
7. Hell is an inescapable place - "And besides all this, between us and you a great chasm has been fixed, in order that those who would pass from here to you may not be able, and none may cross from there to us.’ " (vs. 26). Who would want to try to cross from heaven to hell?...surely people who want to save their loved ones.  However the chasm is so great that it is impossible for anyone to leave their eternal residence.
8. Hell is a place of desperation - The rich man desperately wanted to warn his loved ones (vs. 27-30)
9. God's word in the Scripture is shown to have full sufficiency and power to save us.  "³¹ He said to him, ‘If they do not hear Moses and the Prophets, neither will they be convinced if someone should rise from the dead.’”"  Many people say they will believe if they see a miracle or a sign from God that He is the true God...but think about all the people who didn't believe Jesus in his day...despite the many miracles and signs he performed and that he fulfilled the prophesies written in the new testament about the savior.

If you have read this far in this post, thank you, and I beg you to consider these things in your heart and repent if you do not have real faith in Jesus Christ, the savior from sins and Hell, and the only mediator between God and mankind.  Today and now is the time to repent, for you could die at any moment, and your eternal destiny will be sealed in heaven with God, or in eternal torment in Hell with all people who have rejected Christ.  It's up to you, but I beg you not to waste your life, and in the end to spend an eternity in Hell.

Here's the link to he Steve Lawson sermon if you'd like to listen to it.
http://www.shepherdsconference.org/media/details/?mediaID=7601

To Live is Christ, and to Die is Gain!

Philippians 1:21 NLT "For to me, living means living for Christ, and dying is even better."
Do you love Christ that much that you could say these same words?  Here's a story we heard at home group last night, and it's true!

A man living in China was thrown into prison for his faith in Christ. His cell was completely dark, with only stone floors and walls, and just big enough for one person to lay down in. He remained in this cell in complete darkness and isolation for a long unknown time. Sometimes the guards would throw in a plate of food, and this is why he did not starve to death completely. Finally the day came and the man was released out of his cell. He had been in darkness for so long that he was practically blind when he came out into the light However, his face was shining, and it was astonishing to the other Christians that knew him. They asked him "How did you survive all those years in isolation and darkness?" His answer was amazing to me "What do you mean how did I survive? That time was like a honeymoon with only Christ and I, and to have so much time alone with him, I would do it again gladly."

Now ask yourself this question. Would you react the same way? Do you love Christ that much that you would say the same thing? How precious is Christ for you? The Bible tells us that a Christian is someone who burns in their heart with love and devotion to Christ, no matter what. Do you feel this way about Christ, as your highest treasure? 
Now ask yourself this question. Would you react the same way? Do you love Christ that much that you would say the same thing? How precious is Christ for you? The Bible tells us that a Christian is someone who burns in their heart with love and devotion to Christ, no matter what. Do you feel this way about Christ, as your highest treasure? Now ask yourself this question. Would you react the same way? Do you love Christ that much that you would say the same thing? How precious is Christ for you? The Bible tells us that a Christian is someone who burns in their heart with love and devotion to Christ, no matter what. Do you feel this way about Christ, as your highest treasure? 



This real story was very impacting for me, and I hope it gives you encouragement today as well.

Galatians 2:20 "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."

Who goes to Heaven?

Another title I thought of for this post was "Is your faith real or fake?"  Well anyways, this morning I read in Matthew 25 about the kingdom of God.  There are several parables that Jesus tells, but this one is especially interesting to me this morning.  Maybe because I have been thinking a lot lately about how I can be more effective for the kingdom of God now, before it comes on the earth and it's too late for me to do any more.
14 “For it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted to them his property. 15 To one he gave five talents, to another two, to another one, to each according to his ability. Then he went away. 16 He who had received the five talents went at once and traded with them, and he made five talents more. 17 So also he who had the two talents made two talents more. 18 But he who had received the one talent went and dug in the ground and hid his master’s money. 19 Now after a long time the master of those servants came and settled accounts with them. 20 And he who had received the five talents came forward, bringing five talents more, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me five talents; here I have made five talents more.’ 21 His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ 22 And he also who had the two talents came forward, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me two talents; here I have made two talents more.’ 23 His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ 24 He also who had received the one talent came forward, saying, ‘Master, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you did not sow, and gathering where you scattered no seed, 25 so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. Here you have what is yours.’ 26 But his master answered him, ‘You wicked and slothful servant! You knew that I reap where I have not sown and gather where I scattered no seed? 27 Then you ought to have invested my money with the bankers, and at my coming I should have received what was my own with interest. 28 So take the talent from him and give it to him who has the ten talents. 29 For to everyone who has will more be given, and he will have an abundance. But from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away. 30 And cast the worthless servant into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’ 


This parable makes me think of one thing prominently:  The Lord gives resources to people, and those who are good and faithful servants and use it well, will be rewarded, but those who do not, will be punished.  So what does this mean for professing Christians who do little with their faith, rarely share the gospel (if ever), and keep everything to themselves?  This is unfortunately too common a condition in Christianity today, especially western Christianity. 

Following this parable is another, even more striking and clear in meaning regarding who will enter the kingdom of heaven: 
31 “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, then he will sit on his glorious throne. 32 Before him will be gathered all the nations, and he will separate people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33 And he will place the sheep on his right, but the goats on the left. 34 Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, 36 I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ 37 Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? 38 And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? 39 And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ 40 And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’ 41 “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ 44 Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ 45 Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.’ 46 And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”

And also Matthew 27:7 "“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven."
Jesus tells us that many people will profess to believe in Him, but their life reflected the fact that their heart was never actually changed, and that they were never saved.  All the religion in the world will not save you from the "eternal punishment" Jesus speaks of here.  Simply professing you believe in God will not save you. The Bible says in James 2:19 "You believe that God is one; you do well. Even the demons believe—and shudder!"

To be saved, you need to be born again, something that only comes from God.  
John 3:3 "Jesus answered him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.”"
When you are born again you get a new heart and with it, new desires Ezekiel 36:26 "And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh."  and Matthew 22:37 "And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind."

You may believe you are saved today, and that all is well with your soul and that you will be in heaven when you die...but are you willing to lay back and live in ignorant bliss until the day of your judgment comes to wait and find out if it was true or not?  The Bible also tells us to make sure we have real faith James 2:14 "What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him?"  The answer is no.  If your works do not reflect the changed and reborn heart of a true Christian, then it's probable that you were never saved at all and that you now stand in the path of the wrath of God.

True believers will have the fruit of the Holy Spirit in their lives.  Galatians 5:22-23 "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law."  

My suggestion to you is to pray to God and search your heart and the scriptures, and check your faith to know if it is real or not.  You may want to start reading in Romans, Ephesians and Galatians.


May God bless you to know him as you search for him!