Do Not Lose Heart

The chiropractor I went to yesterday says I have "grade 2" Scoliosis.  Scoliosis is so painful because when the spine is out of alignment it doesn't work properly, which causes everything else around it to not work properly, especially causing muscle pain, nerve pain, etc...

My back is not this noticeably bad, but you can understand by the picture what's happening

I still can't figure out what that means for me in the future, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was true considering how bad my back pain has become over the last 5 years.  Every day for me is a battle, and daily things like cooking and cleaning and travelling on the buses are difficult for me because they cause my back so much pain.  I've been to chiropractors in the past, and no one has told me I have Scoliosis until now.  They told me "You just have a small curve in the thoracic vertebrae"  I almost never have any relief from pain unless I take medicine or seriously rest my back by laying down for a long time.

At this point in my life, I'm so used to this pain that it's normal for me.  I have accepted this pain from the Lord, and I even thank Him for it because I know how much it pushes me to cry out to God for help in the worst times.  The bible teaches that in this life there will be suffering, especially for the children of God.  So I have accepted this from the Lord as part of my suffering, and as a way that He constantly humbles me and tells me "you can't do this without me."

When I came to Ukraine I was pretty concerned about my back health.  In America I was going to the chiropractor once or twice a month to manage my pain and keep my spine in alignment.  Well, until yesterday I haven't seen a chiropractor or doctor in 6 months, and thank God my back hasn't gotten that much worse.  There's been some times when the pain was unbearable and I had to stop and rest or take medicine, but the Lord has given me the strength I prayed for to carry on with life and His mission for me.

As I meditated about all this yesterday I resolved not to worry or lose heart, knowing that apostle Paul was a man ridden with horrible health problems, yet his faith was a shining example of what it means to be a true disciple of Christ.  In 2 Corinthians 4:16 Paul says from personal experience, and to encourage the believers "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

The psalmist also said it like this: Psalm 73:26 "My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

So I will not lose heart despite my circumstances and how horrible I feel, because I know in my heart that all this is just temporary and in a short time I will be relieved of all pain and all troubles and be with the Lord Jesus Christ in eternity.

Please pray for my husband and I not to lose heart or faith in God through all our pain and struggles.  (My husband also has some undiagnosed back problems and pretty bad pain).  Thank you friends, may the Lord Jesus Christ bless you and sanctify you.